How to Help Kids with Homework without Doing It for Them
How to Help Kids with Homework without Doing It for Them
All parents want their children to do their best in school. Part of that is being involved in their schoolwork. Sitting down with your children and helping them understand the instructions, working through hard math problems and looking over their finished homework is all part of a mom’s job description. But where do you draw the line? Is there such a thing as “giving too much help”? The short answer is yes.
There is a difference between helping and doing, and with your heart in the right place, it can be hard not to overstep that line. If you find that your children’s homework is looking more like your own, it’s time to step back.
Make sure the instructions are clear. If your son is having a hard time with a piece of homework, or you check it over and see a lot of mistakes, make sure he understands what the instructions are. Kids are only human, and sometimes have trouble admitting that they don’t understand exactly what they’re supposed to be doing. Have him read you the directions and then ask him to tell you what they mean in his own words. If he’s having a problem “getting” what he’s supposed to be doing, you can explain it in a way that he understands.
Give an example and then let them complete the work. If your child is struggling with fractions, help her work through one problem, supervise her as she works through the next and then give her space to complete the assignment.
Look for completeness and overall correctness. Check to see if the whole assignment is done and that a fair percentage of the answers are correct. If you notice an error or two, let it go. Learning from mistakes applies to homework as well as other life situations. If you see that there are more wrong answers than right ones, he either didn’t understand the assignment or hurried through it to move on to something else. Find out if he needs your help understanding, clarify an questions he has and then let him do the assignment over. If the problem was a struggle with understanding, you can help him learn what he needs to know. If the work wasn’t done correctly because he was rushing, he’ll learn that it’s better to do things right the first time.
Give guidance on projects, but don’t do the work. Throughout the years, your children will have their fair shares of essays, dioramas and presentations. If they ask for help, try to stick more to helping them develop their concepts and troubleshoot any hurdles they face, but let the basic ideas and work be their own. If your ideas take over the project, or you find that you’re up until 4 am the night before it’s due, just trying to get it done, or capture your vision, what did your child really learn? Not only will your child miss the benefits of learning through his work and being proud of his accomplishment, but teachers can tell when a project was done by parents and not students. You’ll totally get busted, and it could cost him a good grade.
Every parent has a duty to help his or her children with schoolwork. The level of help required for your child’s academic success totally depends on your youngster, and some guidance will be needed from time to time. That doesn’t, however, mean that you have to, or should, do the work for them, even with the best of intentions. The best way to help your child succeed in school is to let him or her do the work with your caring supervision. Then, they can truly learn the lessons they are being taught, and be proud of their accomplishments.
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